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Wednesday, July 6, 2016

One of The Most Beautiful Places on Earth

We live in one of the most beautiful areas in the country. I have longed to write about our area for years but have refrained from doing so because it seems that some of the residents in our community can't seem to get along with each other. There are solutions to living with the disagreement that seems to have infected our area and still enjoy the surroundings. A few people who like to constantly stir up problems and generate dissension continue to give our community a bad name. Only because I know people who read this blog and are interested in this area am I writing so they may know that living in this community is not only possible but can be highly rewarding. I have always said that people who live in our area should not confuse friendliness for friendship. Living in a community where some try to keep dissension at the forefront requires carefully evaluating those around you and being extremely careful whom you trust or are willing to let into your safe circle.

Being confused over friends and friendship is not new and almost 350 years B.C. Aristotle was writing about friends and their characteristics.  He concluded that there were three types of friendship. One is based on pleasure in another's company (friendship of pleasure).  Another is based on utility or usefulness in association (friendships of utility) and the last is friendship based on mutual admiration or (friendships of virtue). Those friendships of utility are not real friendships because when the good for one and another ceases the connection is broken and they drift away from that shallow friendship. Those who have friendships of pleasure are only friends as long as that relationship is pleasurable. Both pleasurable and utility only last as long as the parties continue to be alike.

Then there is the perfect friendship which subsists between those who are good and whose similarity consists in their goodness. These type of friendships exist where each of the friends wants the best good for the other. These type friendships are rare and are what should be sought. These are the type of friends who like and admire each other in spite of all their individual flaws. Friends that fall into this category uphold each other in spite of differences and just flat out enjoy each other for who they are.

Most of the friendships in our community are of the former two; utility and  pleasure. When your use is no longer needed or one of the parties are no longer pleasurable, loyalties shift to others. In a fledgling community like ours there are many issues and challenges and that means loyalties tend to be in constant flux. If however you seek a friendship of virtue with others you will find that living in our community has its rewards. One benefit is not associating with negative people and being able to identify them. With all the nature surrounding us and the excellent temperatures it can be a good community to live in.

There are times when you may have to stand your ground with those who want to bring you down to their level but if you have your priorities right they are unable to withstand truth, logic and honesty. In fact, they will hate you for those virtues.

Prospective landowners need to enter the community being aware and realize that friendliness does not equate to friendship. If you mistakenly get in with the wrong people your continued happiness in the community can be fraught with constant fighting over nonsense and trivial issues. Some people prefer to try and destroy others because they are hollow people - lovers of self only. Those are to be avoided once identified.

When we do a Google search of our community there are the propaganda sites within our community and hateful people using a public forum to vent life issues and personality defects. That is not our true area and life can be pleasurable if you but enter carefully and test the water before you jump in fully. I publish topics that I believe people like to read about the good in our area but others for their own reasons publish comments that do not portray a good image of our community. It all depends on what you are willing to put into it and how you view friendship. I see no reason to write again about our community and each person will have to make their own choice having now been forewarned - choose carefully and be happy and enjoy the wonderful natural environment.  


pigsmightfly said...

Bruce how right you are about 'not associating with negative people and being able to identify them'. Your words are true even in our area which has been newly subdivided into large properties. Some couples have moved in and brought their negativity with them. We know who they are and we have nothing to do with them. We have 2 very good sets of neighbours who would do anything for us and we would help them out in a heartbeat.

Anonymous said...

Good article Bruce. Just like any community, you have to be very careful whom you trust. You think you know someone until you give them a little power by electing or appointing them to positions of power. Then they reveal who they really are. I have been burned many times, just like you. Some think that rules and regulations are meant for others. We have a new Board now whom I like. But time will tell whom they really are. I hope we are on the right path now.

Rain said...

I agree totally. My experience is that once you let your guard down and become friendly, people turn on you, use you or take advantage of you. I know I sound like a cynic, but really I'm not. I rent, and have lived in many houses/cottages in all areas in Eastern Canada. My bf and I got friendly with a local man who was super helpful when we first moved here. An incident happened and my bf stood up for us and asked the man, very politely, if he'd not do xyz in our area anymore. Suddenly we're not hearing from a bunch of people who were acquaintances. We do think that word as been spread about us in an unfavourable way but we just don't care anymore. Hermit life seems to be the only way to live in a community these days.

Carol said...

Anonymous, you are correct. Our area now has a new board. Now if prior board members and the "trouble makers" would get a life and get out of their way perhaps things will improve. I won't hold my breath though waiting or even hoping that will happen.

Rain, we are essentially hermits ourselves. We have many friends world wide but only one friend in our community that we can count on...and another couple who are only here for a few months in the summertime. Thank goodness for the internet!!!

Bruce said...

I just heard a man talking about the Dallas shooting and his point is that our politicians starting from the top have our country focused inward. We are not allowed to say Islamic terrorist, and it always us vs them, black vs white, republicans vs democrats, etc.. We citizens in N. America have had our focus turned inward which is now us vs them and we are no longer looking outward at the terrorist, and others that are trying to kill us citizens. I think he is right because we are fighting among ourselves whether it is a small community or a country. Instead our president here in the USA blames guns not the person and hence we are kept from focusing outward on the foreign powers that want us all dead and we argue over the right to own firearms or who can use which bathroom and everything is focused inward and we are preying on each other.
People are people and some won't get along but we have been turned into groups of we vs them.

Anonymous said...

I live in a city of less than 8,000 people. Gossip and rumors are prevalent here. Privacy? Forget it. They think you're hiding something. I'm going to move to a larger city where people are too busy living their lives to be concerned about how I'm living mine.