Funny Story:

 About 55 years ago I was in an all branch military group.  At that time we were a small group of men from all four branches of the military. Our commander was a four star general and we were going on maneuvers at Avon Park, Fla. for some outback and swamp training. I was put in charge of the support personnel like cooks, and those who would establish our base camp. All in all it was about 30-40 men. 

 We were all armed but I was the only one who had live ammunition. The others just had weapons - but no live rounds. The general asked if I would take a small group and find him a place to do some fishing so I was out scouting for a good place to fish. Back at the camp the others were busy setting up tents etc. 

The sleeping tents were all set up with rows of cots. We had an evening meal and turned in. I have never liked those cots as they were uncomfortable so I crawled into my army green mummy bag and slept on the ground. I had put my loaded .45 on the cot. The tent sides were up so we could get some fresh air. In the middle of the night I felt this hot fowl breath on my face and I woke up suddenly to look into two large black holes. A large brahma cow was standing over me and the herd had  come inside our large tent. 

I tried to unzip my sleeping bag but the zipper jammed and I was trapped. I finally got my hand out and then my arm and reached my .45, but getting a shell into the chamber required two hands. I finally got it in the sleeping bag and put a round in the chamber. I finally got my hand with the .45 out but in the interim I was going across the ground like a big worm. I got out from under the cow and let a round go through the top of the tent. 

No wonder those cows were all around me as they had obviously never seen a worm that big go across the ground. When I shot that round off pandemonium broke loose. Those cows all took off  in a rush. One of the other guys helped me get my sipper unstuck and we all finally went back to sleep. The rest of the men were at the end of the tent where it was enclosed and that was probably where I should have been also.  Had to have been a funny sight.